October 4, 2012 by Preeks
What? You thought I had disappeared again? If only.
I am saying this one last time on this blog.
Dear God, sometimes, you are really really unfair. And in times like those, I am sorry to say, but I feel jealous of atheists. At least, they don’t feel guilty saying thank god.
I mean, pray explain your logic behind making me take decisions I will regret later. If you and I had to play the “I-Told-You-So-Game”, trust me, our equation would be very different. Seriously? I told you so? That’s your BIG idea? I am disappointed.
And while on the subject, it would be great if you could explain to me why some people have ALL the luck in the world, while others have none. You have probably not attended B-School, but any voracious newspaper reader could explain to you the concept of Economies of Scale. Remember? Why do I always get phased out by luck? Why can’t you distribute luck equally! Bruce Almighty had a very valid point when he went around dividing the lottery amount by the amount of people who applied. Maybe he made better God.
Kidding. Don’t take revenge now. Please.
So, what is it like being God? Lists of requests, you keep ticking them off on first come first serve basis? Or are we looking at a systematic system where you tag people whose one request has been fulfilled and remove them off the system till others are catered to?
I am guessing first-come-always-served. I get it. Its the easy way out. Have done it several times myself.
But let’s put this in perspective.
6,973,738,433 people or approximately 7 Billion.
Assuming 10% atheists, we are left with 6.3 Billion believers.
At a decent rate of 2 requests per day, we have around 13 billion requests.
Now, if 20% of these are smart-asses who get up early in the morning to place their requests, the rest 80% normal people are basically as good as non-believers. Because, they are never first and hence, by your own admission, never served!
That’s an efficiency rate lower than the passport office in Delhi!
I promise not to say that out aloud. No revenge, please!
Also, one last thing. When you made me, you apparently forgot to put in a filter, right before the tongue. I keep saying things I shouldn’t. I know. Its too late to fix that. But, if I promise not to file an RTI for the above problems, will you at least promise me this one thing? Every time I say something stupid, just make sure the other person is not paying attention to me! Would make life a whole lot easier!
Rant ends here.
How you doing, otherwise? All good, I hope!